
What Causes Complex Trauma and How Does It Develop?
Could Your Child Be Struggling More Than You Realise?
As parents and carers, we want the best for our children. But recognising when a child is struggling emotionally or behaviourally is not always straightforward. Children and teens do not always have the words to express what they are going through, and sometimes the signs can be easy to dismiss as “just a phase.”
According to the Mental Health Foundation, 50% of mental health problems are established by age 14, and 75% by age 24. That statistic alone highlights how important it is to pay attention to early warning signs and seek support when something does not feel right. As a therapy clinic in Brighton and Hove, we work with families every day who were unsure at first whether their child needed professional help. The truth is, seeking support early can make a significant difference.
In this guide, we explore 10 signs your child might benefit from therapy, how to distinguish normal developmental ups and downs from persistent warning signs, and what to do if you are concerned about your child’s emotional wellbeing.
1. Persistent Sadness or Emotional Withdrawal
All children feel sad from time to time. A bad day at school, a disagreement with a friend, or disappointment over something they were looking forward to can all cause temporary low moods. However, when sadness lingers for weeks or your child begins to withdraw from family, friends, and activities they used to enjoy, it could point to something deeper.
Persistent sadness or social withdrawal in children can sometimes be an early indicator of depression or another mental health concern. If your child seems emotionally flat, has lost interest in hobbies or socialising, or spends increasing amounts of time alone, these are signs worth paying attention to. Child mental health support from a qualified therapist can help your child explore and process these feelings in a safe and supportive environment.
2. Frequent Tantrums, Anger, or Aggression
It is perfectly normal for younger children to have occasional tantrums, and for teenagers to push boundaries. However, when outbursts of anger, aggression, or defiance become frequent, intense, or out of proportion to the situation, it may suggest that your child is struggling to manage their emotions.
Behavioural therapy for children can be particularly effective in these situations. A trained child therapist can work with your child to understand what is driving the behaviour and develop healthier coping strategies. If tantrums or aggressive episodes are affecting your child’s relationships at home or at school, or are causing distress to the wider family, it is worth considering whether professional support could help.
3. Excessive Worry, Fears, or Anxiety That Will Not Go Away
Children experience fear and worry as part of normal development. Being afraid of the dark, worrying about a test, or feeling nervous on the first day at a new school are all common experiences. But when these worries become constant, overwhelming, or disproportionate, they can start to interfere with daily life.
Therapy for anxiety in children is one of the most common reasons families contact us at The Therapy Clinic. Signs that anxiety may have moved beyond the ordinary include frequent stomach aches or headaches with no medical cause, avoidance of everyday situations, difficulty sleeping due to worry, or needing constant reassurance. School anxiety support is something we are frequently asked about, as many children find the school environment a significant source of stress. A private child therapist can help your child develop tools to manage their anxiety and build resilience.
4. Sudden Changes in Eating Habits
A noticeable shift in your child’s eating habits, whether eating significantly more or significantly less, can be a sign of emotional distress. While appetite naturally fluctuates during growth spurts and developmental stages, sudden or sustained changes that do not have an obvious physical cause should not be overlooked.
Changes in eating can sometimes be linked to anxiety, depression, low self-esteem, or difficulties at school or in friendships. If you notice your child refusing meals, hiding food, or developing an unusual preoccupation with eating, these are signals that their emotional wellbeing may need attention. A child psychologist in Brighton can help assess whether these changes are connected to underlying emotional or psychological difficulties.
5. Sleep Disturbances or Repeated Nightmares
Sleep is essential for a child’s physical and emotional development, and disruptions to sleep patterns can be both a symptom and a cause of mental health difficulties. Difficulty falling asleep, frequent waking during the night, or repeated nightmares can all be indicators that something is troubling your child.
While occasional bad dreams are a normal part of childhood, recurring nightmares, particularly those with distressing or violent themes, may suggest that your child is processing stress, anxiety, or even trauma. If sleep problems persist and are affecting your child’s mood, energy levels, or ability to function during the day, it may be time to explore children’s mental health support. Therapy can provide a space for children to work through the fears or experiences that are disrupting their rest.
6. A Noticeable Decline in School Performance
When a child who has previously been doing well at school starts to struggle academically, it is natural to wonder what has changed. A sudden drop in grades, difficulty concentrating, reluctance to attend school, or feedback from teachers about changes in behaviour can all be connected to emotional or psychological difficulties.
Mental health therapy for children can help identify whether issues such as anxiety, low mood, bullying, or difficulties at home are affecting your child’s ability to engage with learning. School is one of the main environments where emotional difficulties often become visible, and a decline in performance should be taken seriously, particularly if it is accompanied by other signs on this list. If your child is struggling at school and you are based in the Brighton and Hove area, our clinical services include therapy for children and teens tailored to their individual needs.
7. Regression to Younger Behaviours
Regression refers to a child reverting to behaviours they had previously outgrown. This might include bedwetting, thumb-sucking, baby talk, increased clinginess, or separation anxiety in a child who had previously been confident and independent.
While brief periods of regression can occur during times of change, such as starting a new school or the arrival of a sibling, sustained regression that does not resolve on its own can be a sign that your child is feeling overwhelmed, unsafe, or emotionally distressed. It is their way of communicating that they need extra support. The NSPCC highlights that different children may show different signs of poor mental health at different ages, and regression is one of the key indicators to watch for. If your child is showing signs of regression, a child therapist can help you understand what may be driving it and work with your child to feel more secure.
8. Self-Harm Talk or Expressing a Desire to Disappear
This is one of the most serious warning signs, and it should always be taken seriously, no matter how casually it is expressed. If your child talks about wanting to hurt themselves, says things like “I wish I wasn’t here” or “everyone would be better off without me,” or shows any signs of self-harm, it is essential to seek help promptly.
These statements may reflect deep emotional pain that your child does not know how to express or manage. Even if you are not sure whether your child truly means what they are saying, erring on the side of caution is always the right approach. Contact a mental health professional, speak to your GP, or reach out to organisations such as YoungMinds, which offers a parents’ helpline for guidance and support. If you would like to speak to someone at our clinic, please do not hesitate to get in touch.
9. Social Difficulties or Trouble Maintaining Friendships
Friendships play a vital role in a child’s development, helping them learn empathy, cooperation, and communication skills. When a child consistently struggles to make or keep friends, is frequently left out, or experiences repeated conflicts with peers, it can have a significant impact on their self-esteem and emotional wellbeing.
Social difficulties can stem from a range of underlying issues, including anxiety, difficulty reading social cues, low confidence, or experiences of bullying. Emotional support for children in this area can help them build the skills they need to navigate social relationships more effectively. Therapy for teens is also particularly relevant here, as the teenage years bring added social pressures and complexities that can feel overwhelming.
10. A Traumatic or Significant Life Event
Children can be deeply affected by events that disrupt their sense of safety and stability. Bereavement, parental separation, a house move, witnessing domestic conflict, bullying, or any form of abuse can all have a lasting impact on a child’s mental health.
Sometimes the effects of a traumatic experience are not immediately visible. A child may seem to cope well initially but begin to show symptoms weeks or even months later. If your child has been through a difficult experience, keeping a close eye on their behaviour and emotional state in the following months is important. Our blog on what causes complex trauma and how it develops and our article on symptoms that may indicate complex trauma offer further reading on this topic. Therapy can provide a safe space for children to process these experiences and begin to heal.
How to Tell If It Is Just a Phase or Something More
One of the most common questions we hear from parents is, “How do I know if this is just a phase?” It is a valid question, and the answer is not always clear-cut. However, there are some general guidelines that can help.
Consider whether the behaviour or mood change has persisted for several weeks, whether it is present in more than one setting (for example, both at home and at school), and whether it is interfering with your child’s ability to function in their daily life. If the answer to any of these is yes, it may be worth exploring professional support. Trust your instincts as a parent or carer. You know your child better than anyone, and if something feels off, seeking guidance is always a positive step.
Understanding the difference between child therapy and child psychotherapy can also help you make an informed decision about the type of support that might suit your child best.
Why Early Support for Children’s Mental Health Truly Matters
Research consistently shows that early intervention in children’s mental health leads to better outcomes. When children receive the right support at the right time, they are more likely to develop effective coping strategies, maintain stronger relationships, and thrive both at school and at home.
The NHS provides a range of resources for families seeking support, and we always encourage parents to explore all available options. At The Therapy Clinic, we believe that every child deserves access to quality emotional and psychological support. Based in Brighton and Hove, we offer a range of clinical services delivered by a team of highly qualified and experienced practitioners. We also understand that cost can be a concern, which is why we offer cost-sensitive counselling and psychotherapy options to make therapy as accessible as possible.
Frequently Asked Questions
How do I know if my child needs therapy or is just going through a phase?
It can be difficult to tell, but a useful rule of thumb is to consider how long the behaviour has lasted, whether it appears across multiple settings, and whether it is affecting your child’s ability to function day to day. If concerning behaviours persist for several weeks and are impacting their wellbeing, it may be worth speaking to a professional.
At what age can a child start therapy?
Children of various ages can benefit from therapy, though the approach will differ depending on their developmental stage. Younger children may benefit from play-based therapeutic approaches, while older children and teens are often more suited to talking therapies. A qualified child therapist can advise on the most appropriate approach for your child.
What types of therapy are available for children?
There are several approaches to child therapy, including Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), psychodynamic psychotherapy, integrative therapy, and person-centred approaches. The right choice depends on your child’s individual needs and circumstances. You can learn more about the different approaches on our clinical services page.
Will my child have to talk about their feelings?
Not necessarily. Therapy for children is adapted to suit their age and comfort level. Many therapists use creative and play-based methods to help younger children express themselves without relying solely on verbal communication. The therapist will always work at a pace that feels safe for your child.
How long does child therapy usually last?
The duration of therapy varies depending on the child’s needs and the nature of the difficulties they are experiencing. Some children benefit from a shorter period of focused work, while others may need longer-term support. Your therapist will discuss this with you and review progress regularly.
Should I talk to my GP before seeking private therapy for my child?
While it is not essential, speaking to your GP can be helpful. They can rule out any physical health concerns that might be contributing to your child’s symptoms and can also make referrals to NHS services if appropriate. However, you are also welcome to contact a private child therapist directly. At The Therapy Clinic in Brighton, we offer a free initial consultation where you can discuss your concerns and explore the best options for your child.
Your Child Does Not Have to Face It Alone
If you have recognised any of these signs in your child, please know that reaching out for support is one of the most caring things you can do. At The Therapy Clinic in Brighton and Hove, we are here to help. The first step is to contact us to book an appointment for a free initial consultation. You will meet with one of our senior practitioners, and following this initial appointment, we will direct you to a suitable therapist, taking account of your child’s needs, preferences, available times, and budget.
You can reach us by emailing info@therapyclinicbrighton.com or by visiting our contact page to send us a message. You can also call us on 01273 068175. We look forward to hearing from you and supporting your family.

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