Many of us will encounter some form of Depression during our lives, whether we go through it ourselves or it impacts someone close to us. We will all experience low moods as it’s a normal part of life, but when these negative feelings begin to impact our daily lives and exhibit as physical symptoms, it can be a sign of depression. Depression is a common mental health problem but It’s important to recognise that it can become a serious condition which, if left untreated, can interfere with our work, sleep, appetite and energy levels.

What is Depression?

Depression is a mental condition which revolves around negative feelings which impact what you think, how you feel about yourself and others, and how you act. It’s commonly understood as a perpetual feeling of sadness and loss of interest in the things that you enjoyed about life. However depression is a lot more than feeling down and listless. You can start to feel physical effects that interrupt your daily life such as insomnia, loss of appetite, difficulties with concentrating and low energy and loss of motivation.

Statistics suggest that around 1 in 6 people have experienced depression at some point in their lives. While a common condition, not everyone is fully aware of the symptoms. Because of this, many people go undiagnosed, missing out on the treatment that they need to feel better. If ignored depression can develop into a more severe condition and at that point, it can be paralysing. If you and someone close to you is going through depression, reaching out for help is a crucial step towards getting control back of your life.

What are the common symptoms of depression?

Depression affects the mood and the body in different ways but most people experience the same common symptoms. If you are experiencing some of the following signs and have been for the past two weeks, there is a strong likelihood that you have depression.

• Continuous feelings of sadness
• Feeling hopeless and pessimistic
• Irritability
• Feeling guilt-ridden
• Loss of motivation
• Difficulty with decision making
• Decreased energy levels
• Difficulty with sleeping or sleeping too much
• Changes in appetite – either a loss of appetite or overeating
• Low sex drive and loss of libido
• Unexplained aches and pains
• Digestive issues such as constipation and diarrhoea
• Thoughts of death or suicide (ideation)

There are people with depression who live with the symptoms and can still manage to get through their daily lives still functioning. However, just because you can get up in the morning and go to work doesn’t mean that you should be leaving your depression untreated. Maybe you feel as if nothing will ever help or that you can’t get better? Part of depression includes feeling hopeless. The fact of the matter is that you can get help.

Depression & Anxiety

While different conditions, depression and anxiety can arise together as they both involve negative thoughts. Many of the changes to the mood are the same so sometimes the conditions can be mistaken for each other. Both can leave you feeling irrational irritability and hopelessness. Depression and anxiety can affect your sleep and your diet, leaving you with physical symptoms as well as emotional ones. The key difference is that depression leaves you with low energy and a lack of motivation. With anxiety, you’ll feel tense and jittery, often feeling on edge and fearful.

The risks of severe depression

Leaving depression untreated can cause a downward spiral as the feelings of hopelessness are left to continue. In more extreme cases there is a risk of encountering thoughts of death and suicide In these cases people can reach a point where they are unable to reach out for help themselves. They may feel trapped and without a way out and as a consequence start to have feelings of having no reason to live or thoughts of suicide.

How is depression treated?

Depression is often treated through medication and talking therapies. The action that we recommend is to first talk to a professional – whether that is your GP, a psychotherapist or a counsellor. Treatment depends on the severity of the depression. More severe conditions often benefit from a combination of antidepressant medication and therapy to address the symptoms and then treat the cause.

It’s important to know that you don’t need to wait for a diagnosis to get help. Your mental health is important with or without labels to identify what you’re feeling and thinking. Seeking out a therapist early on can offset the depression before it starts to interfere with your daily life. Learning important techniques to challenge the negative thoughts before they spiral will prevent them from taking over.

Getting help with depression

Taking the first step is the hardest and the most monumental towards recovery. It all starts with talking. Whether you reach out first to a friend or family member, acknowledging your mental health and understanding that there is something wrong gets you closer towards relief.

Based in Brighton? If you believe you have depression or need to talk to a therapist, you can arrange for an initial consultation Email us on info@therapyclinicbrighton.com to find out the next steps or book an initial appointment online here.

We have all been stressed. It’s impossible to not be during this day and age when we have so many things on our minds. Whether it’s work related or a problem at home, it’s difficult to escape when we’re in the moment. Not all stress is a bad thing. It’s a natural reaction to prepare us and gear us up so we’re in the best shape to tackle a problem. In small doses, stress is normal. Some people thrive under stressful conditions, perfectly able to function under pressure and then can unwind afterwards. However, there’s also the other side of stress. What if we can’t unwind? What if it doesn’t stop and we’re stuck in a stressful situation without any sign of relief? What if we’re coming home from work and we’re still stressed? That is when it becomes a problem and it interferes with your everyday life. Everyone deserves time off from stress.

What is stress?

Stress is a reaction to a problematic situation. In order for you to be in the best physical shape to cope in a potentially harmful situation, your heart rate increases, your muscles tense and your breathing quickens. This is all down to a chemical reaction in your body for when adrenaline enters your bloodstream in response to the stimulus that triggered your stress. Adrenaline causes a ‘fight-or-flight’ response, preparing you for danger. The issue with stress is that the reaction is often disproportionate to the problem. You’ll trigger the same physical reaction in your body that’s hard-wired in us all to get us out of threatening situations. So when you’re running late for a meeting or have an up-coming exam that you don’t feel prepared for, your body’s chemical reaction is the same as if you’re in danger.

What are the different types of stress?

There are two main branches of stress – acute and chronic. Acute stress is the form it takes when you need to have a burst of energy to deal with a current issue. It lasts only for a few hours, but it can become very overwhelming. Chronic stress stays with us if we’re living in a situation that is constantly firing off the triggers that make us feel threatened and under pressure. Both types of stress can affect our mental, emotional and physical wellbeing.

What are the symptoms of stress?

The moment stress starts to impact our health. It’s a signal that it’s time to look for ways to reduce stress levels so you can manage them. Stress tends to form a cycle where the symptoms themselves end up becoming a cause for stress in itself.

Emotional signs of stress

• Agitation and short temper
• Feeling overwhelmed as if you aren’t in control of the situation
• Constant anxiety
• Low mood and sadness
• Fear of failure

Physical signs of stress

• Headaches and migraines
• Muscle tension and aches
• Upset stomach including constipation, sickness and diarrhoea
• Racing heart and palpitations
• Frequent colds down to a reduced immune response
• Dry mouth and thirst
• Clenching jaw and grinding teeth (bruxism)

Psychological signs of stress

• Lack of concentration
• Restlessness
• Memory issues
• Difficulty with decision-making
• Difficulty with sleeping (insomnia)

When is stress a problem?

The moment stress doesn’t go away naturally, it’s a problem. Your body can handle small bouts of stress, but not long-term. If not managed, stress can contribute to health problems. including mental health conditions such as depression and anxiety. Stress also has an impact on blood pressure and heart disease.

Identifying when stress is a problem is the easy part. The challenge is how to manage it and cope under situations which we find ourselves in. Everyday life doesn’t always give us the chance to make do on the fight-or-flight response. In these situations, stress can exhibit itself as anxiety, potentially even causing panic attacks. If we are able to tackle stress before it takes over, we’ll be able to reduce the symptoms and impacts on our mental and physical health. However, sometimes the cause for stress isn’t straight-forward and there can be many different triggers layered together. We might not be able to take ourselves out of the situation causing the stress, but we can better understand it and acknowledge what about the situation makes you feel a certain way. Once we know the root of the problem, we can start to address the cause and manage stress in a healthier way.

How to manage stress

Many different situations will cause us to feel stressed. Everyone feels stress for different reasons and you’ll not always feel the same level of stress towards the same situation as someone else might. The important thing is to recognise when our level of stress is causing a problem in our daily life Rather than worry about whether the stress we feel is justified.

Breathing techniques

Slowing down your breathing during a stressful time will lower your heart rate and reduce the physical symptoms of stress. If your heart is racing and the stress is building, take a moment to catch your breath. You should breathe from your diaphragm to ensure you make use of your full lung capacity so feel it go all the way down to your stomach when you breathe in. Take slow, measured breaths, counting 1 to 5, breathing in through your nose and out through your mouth. If you keep this up for five minutes, you’ll start to feel much calmer.

Set achievable goals

One of the main causes for stress is being confronted by a huge task that makes us feel completely overwhelmed. It can leave us feeling like it’s impossible to get done, that there’s no point in trying or that we have to work ourselves to the bone to get a deadline met. Rather than thinking of it as one huge undertaking, we can split it into smaller steps. Looking at a problem as a series of small tasks helps us to realistically set goals rather than stress out about an impossible one.

Be kind to yourself

Learning to care for yourself will help you to feel better about a situation. If you feel stressed give yourself breaks during the day. We don’t have to be busy every second of the day in order to get things done. Time out from the stress is necessary to look after your own health and wellbeing. If you blame or question yourself for the level of stress you feel it will almost certainly make it worse

Exercise regularly

Letting off some steam gives you that necessary catharsis. Exercise doesn’t just look after your physical health, but tops you up with endorphins that will improve your mood and outlook on things as a whole. You’ll also be able to take yourself out of the stressful situation for a moment and burn off the pent up energy that’s causing all the stress in the first place.

Talk to someone

You don’t have to struggle alone with stress even if that’s how it feels sometimes. If a situation is overwhelming you, then it can help to share the burden with someone. If you are struggling to manage stress You might want to consider seeking professional help Therapy can help you get through a stressful time in your life that you don’t feel able to manage yourself. Whether you’re going through a problem at work, relationship issues, money problems or legal matters, therapy can help you through the challenges you’re facing.

Speak with a therapist

If stress is becoming a problem and you’re based in Brighton, you can arrange for an appointment with one of our certified psychotherapists or counsellors. To get started on managing your stress, you can book for an initial consultation here, email us on info@therapyclinicbrighton.com or call on 01273 068175.

Communication is key to any long-lasting, strong relationship. Yet it doesn’t always come naturally and it’s no one’s fault. Sometimes there can be issues getting in the way of communicating properly, either through a lack of confidence or belief that you’ll be heard. A past incident where poor communication led to a misunderstanding might result in giving up on trying, not believing that you can talk without dissolving into an argument. It can be disheartening when communication starts to break down which leads to a rift in the relationship. Arguments fail to get properly resolved when neither party is listening or being properly heard. It can feel like an ongoing struggle and frustrations can boil over to a breaking point. Couples therapy can help stop a relationship from reaching that crisis point through helping with better communication.

However, a relationship doesn’t have to be struggling to benefit from relationship counselling. Better communication skills can lead to a more rewarding relationship where both individuals form a better understanding of one enough, strengthening your bond. Happy, loving relationships blossom through respectful communication where both parties speak and listen.

Deal with communication challenges in a safe environment

Therapy gives you a chance to be open about your communication problems in a safe place where you can bring up sensitive topics without worrying about judgement. Sometimes, for us to communicate our feelings, we first need to understand them. Having a therapist to act as an impartial mediator and a sounding board helps you to analyse your own feelings. Once you find yourself in a safe place, you can start to pick up better tools for getting your feelings and thoughts heard within your relationship.

Teach you to be a better listener

Communication is a two-way street. During couples therapy, active listening exercises give you the chance to support your partner as a good listener. Many communication problems come about because couples aren’t giving each other the chance to speak. They interrupt each other as their need to be heard overrules the need to listen. Allowing your partner to speak and understand their point of view gives you the chance to think of your response while knowing their opinions and feelings first. You aren’t at risk of making your partner feel like you misunderstand or aren’t listening.

Be confident with expressing yourself

Self-confidence can cause problems with communication. If you don’t feel validated, you’ll be less likely to bring up how you feel to your partner. Maybe you are worried about how they will react? Or maybe you feel like it’s not a problem? Learning to understand that your feelings are just as valid as your partner’s will help you to open up and be vulnerable around them. This builds on trust as your partner has the chance to support you and listen to your worries.

Building on your communication skills in a therapy session reaffirms that it’s okay to talk about personal and challenging topics with your partner. As they then learn to listen and see your perspective, they will understand you better and be in a good place to help you when you need them the most.

Reading non-verbal cues

Communication doesn’t always use words. In couples therapy, you will also become more familiar with body language and cues that you may sometimes miss or misinterpret. You can also discuss how you interpret your partner’s body language and get their perspective on why they act that way. This builds on how well you understand each other and gives you both confidence to start a dialogue when you notice something off about the other’s behaviour.

Helps enforce positive language

Using positive framing in any conversation, with your partner or not, helps form a good discussion and avoids conflicts – even if you aren’t in agreement. If you take a moment to look at how to frame your point in a positive light, you aren’t going to be faced with a defensive partner who feels under attack. In couples therapy, you’ll learn how to use positive language when communicating with your partner.

Take accountability for your thoughts and feelings

One key communication skill is learning how to own how you feel. Arguments happen in a relationship, whether over something big or small. The way you take responsibility for your own feelings in the argument can make a difference and help you to reach a resolution sooner rather than playing the blame game. You can do this in therapy by learning to use ‘I’ rather than ‘you’ when you make your point. Your partner can then understand where you’re coming from, rather than feel like they need to defend themselves.

Understand your partner’s perspective

In a relationship, you don’t always have to agree on everything. Knowing where your partner is coming from always helps communication follow naturally. Even if you’re in a conversation where you don’t feel like they are going to see your point of view, respect that they have their own way of thinking – just as you do. Couples therapy helps you to better see things through their eyes. This helps rule out misunderstandings as you can take a moment to reflect on what they’re saying and think about how they’ve come to their conclusions. Rather than call them out on being wrong, you can understand their perspective and maybe even ask them if they thought about the problem a different way. If you then validate their feelings, they’ll appreciate that you’re listening and trying to understand, rather than simply flat out disagree.

Build on your communication skills by booking couples therapy

As every couple faces different challenges, the solution isn’t always the same for everyone. However, good communication is the starting point and it’s where relationship counselling focuses first. Learning to listen and understand while also communicating your own feelings will help you both to feel validated in your relationship.

If you are considering getting help with communication or any other aspect of your relationship you can get in touch with us by emailing admin@therapyclinicbrighton.com. We will then contact you to ask you to fill out a short information form before arranging an initial appointment for you with one of our couples therapists.

Arguments and disagreements in a relationship happen. You aren’t always going to see eye-to-eye on everything. Relationships can all benefit from having a safe space for both to just talk and get to understand each other better. While it’s normal to have arguments in a relationship, improving communication, understanding each other’s perspectives and coming to appreciate your own worth in the relationship all contribute towards finding resolutions faster.

Couples therapy benefits couples in all manner of situations. There doesn’t have to be a crisis point in a relationship to need the help of a counsellor. Below are some of the benefits that couples therapy can bring;

1. Understand Each Other Better

   Part of couples counselling involves building on empathy in the relationship. Understanding your partner’s perspective and viewpoints helps you to rationalise their reactions to things you say and do. Their responses will make more sense and you’ll be in a better position to help. This helps resolve any misunderstandings which lead to friction in the relationship..

2. Resolve Disputes With A Neutral Party

   Sometimes, you need a neutral mediator to get through a dispute that is really impacting your relationship. Friends and family can struggle to act impartially when it’s a personal matter that affects you both. Your counsellor is well placed to listen to both sides and help with a fresh perspective with what’s happening . Some disputes are much more serious than others and will take time to work out. Having someone neutral available to control the narrative away from cyclical arguments will get you closer to solving the conflict without fear of things escalating. As a result, you both understand each other’s sides of the conflict and develop further understanding.

3. Improve Communication

   When you admit to friends and family that you’re having a disagreement with your partner, very often you get told to ‘just talk to them about it’. If only that was so simple. Communicating our feelings doesn’t come naturally to everyone. Couples therapy helps you to learn and feel comfortable with expressing how you feel.

   More than that, however, couples therapy also helps you learn how to listen. Communication is a two-way street. While you learn how to talk openly about your opinions and wishes, your partner learns how to listen. Conversation becomes more of an enjoyable practice for you both, leading to fewer disagreements as you can both communicate comfortably around each other.

4. Restore Trust

   Trust is essential for any healthy relationship. Rebuilding trust takes time and a lot of commitment from both parties. Feelings such as rejection, abandonment, betrayal and guilt are hard to work through, but with enough patience, understanding and forgiveness, trust can be reestablished over time. Whatever the cause for the fracture or distress in the relationship , we can work together to heal wounds and help to build on feelings of mutual respect in a relationship. We encourage open communication to work through any future mistrust and fears, reinforcing transparency and a commitment towards the relationship.

5. Good for Self-Awareness

   Couples therapy doesn’t just focus on the relationship. It also focuses on you and helps you understand your own needs and what you’d like out of the relationship. In therapy, you’ll have the freedom to explore your feelings and discuss them openly. What you come to learn about yourself may surprise even you and learning why you feel a certain way helps to validate why you become hurt in particular situations. Understanding your triggers and behaviours will also help your partner to understand.

6. Deal With Roadblocks In The Relationship

   Couples therapy works through issues that you may struggle to work through on your own, or might be avoiding as they’re difficult to talk about. These roadblocks stop you from moving forwards or cause you to feel stuck or even cause you to consider giving up on the relationship entirely. These can be major life-changing decisions that neither of you can agree on or it could just be an impasse. Your counsellor can help unpick the situation and work with you on exploring the underlying emotions.

7. Improve Intimacy

   Reigniting your passions for each other and rekindling your attraction can help reconnect a relationship that is drifting apart. Common for long-term relationships within a marriage, the spark can feel as if its dimmed. Couples therapy helps you both to talk openly about what you miss about each other. Intimacy doesn’t just mean the physical aspect of the relationship, but an emotional one. You can take comfort from each other through physical contact, but you can also reconnect by letting your partner in when you feel vulnerable. Feeling loved and appreciated goes a long way in a relationship.

Don’t let things fester between you and reach out to a couples counsellor

While many individuals are able to admit that they need therapy when struggling, couples are less likely to admit that their relationship needs the same help. Couples therapy is for relationships in any stage. If you’re both unhappy and unable to resolve the tension between you on your own, couples therapy is that safe space for you to work through your problems and come away as a stronger couple as a result.

Couples therapy isn’t just about resolving conflicts and moving past them. It’s about nurturing a bond that’s built on communication and understanding.

If you would like to arrange an initial appointment with one of our couples counsellors, email us at admin@therapyclinicbrighton.com. We will then be in touch with the next steps.

Be Part of the Team at The Therapy Clinic

Good news – we are offering placements to qualified and trainee therapists to come and work at the Therapy Clinic. Our placement opportunities are open to therapists at all
stages of their career from trainee level through to qualified, accredited and senior accredited
status.

The Therapy Clinic Brighton are committed to providing high quality accessible therapy services and are looking for you to join our team of psychotherapists,
counsellors and psychologists.

We’re offering both trainee and post qualification placements for psychotherapists, counsellors and counselling psychologists.

If you would like to be considered for a placement read the attached document The Therapy Clinic_ Placements and apply no later than 30 November 2020.

Follow us on social media at facebook, twitter, instagram, or linkedin.

How’s everyone holding up?

The Therapy Clinic team have been working hard to transition our ‘business as usual’ over to online since social distancing and lockdown began in March 2020. We are continuing to offer regular therapy sessions, and consultations using video link and have been able to continue to support many clients this way.

In addition, we are launching new services specifically designed to offer affordable, high quality, support to individuals affected by Covid-19.

The first of these is Covid-19 online counselling and support.

We are offering short term online counselling for individuals and couples who need help in dealing with the impact of Covid-19, including:

• Dealing with loneliness and isolation
• Managing anxiety
• Managing uncertainty
• Helping with relationship stress / conflict
• Adjusting to working from home
• Looking after your own mental health when you are focussed on helping others
• Dealing with grief and loss

Members of our therapy team are offering a free initial consultation and up to 5 further sessions at a reduced rate of £35 for individuals and £50 for couples

You can book an initial assessment through our website.

You can find out more about us;

On our website: www.therapyclinicbrighton.com

By emailing: info@therapyclinicbrighton.com

Or following us on social media at facebook, twitter, instagram, or linkedin.

Happy New Year from The Therapy Clinic team!

Going in to 2020 we have a new cycle of Talks at 1. These are talks held at The Therapy Clinic over lunchtimes where practitioners are able to come together, share knowledge and learn about different therapeutic models from each other.

At the end of 2019, Rachel Singh and Jacqui Paterson facilitated the third instalment of our introduction to DBT. Kate West summarised the experience: 

“The third instalment of our introduction to DBT began with us grounding ourselves with the use of mindfulness. Having never been asked to focus on the space between our eyes, the space between our ears, the feeling of the soles of our feet, the feeling of breath behind our eyes, it was a fascinating albeit brief experience. For the majority of us it worked to start to slow/refocus our thoughts and begin to shut out the noise in our heads that plagues us all. This is one of the valuable tools of Distress Tolerance that make up the third module in the DBT programme, and that everyone could surely benefit from. 

We learnt that the core thinking behind distress tolerance is the ability to accept reality, and to tolerate it, which is very different to trying to change it. If able to do this, we’re much better able to ‘survive’ a crisis. It’s the power of being able to tolerate the emotions that come up, without feeling totally flooded or overwhelmed, being able to keep a sense of ‘wise self’ which requires a degree of both cognitive self and emotional self.

The ways to do this include STOP (Stop, Take a step back, Observe, Proceed mindfully), TIP skills to change body chemistry (splashing face with cold water, intense exercise, paced breathing, paired muscle relaxation), Improving the moment (with imagery, with meaning, with prayer, with relaxing actions, with encouragement) and perhaps the most important skill of all: Radical Acceptance.

Radical Acceptance is not to be confused with approving of reality, it’s simply an acknowledgement of reality, not fighting (and intensify our emotional reaction, causing more suffering), but accepting the pain in our lives.  Once we do this we can better start to find a way out of it. The key seems to be in the word radical – it really is far-reaching and fundamental.

We look forward to the next in this series of DBT introductory talks to further equip ourselves with the knowledge of this immensely effective toolkit.”

If you would like to begin your own therapy journey, you can book an initial assessment through our website.

You can find out more about us;

On our website: www.therapyclinicbrighton.com

By emailing: info@therapyclinicbrighton.com

Or following us on social media at facebook, twitter, instagram, or linkedin.