
When Does Stress Become a Problem?
Many of us will encounter some form of Depression during our lives, whether we go through it ourselves or it impacts someone close to us. We will all experience low moods as it’s a normal part of life, but when these negative feelings begin to impact our daily lives and exhibit as physical symptoms, it can be a sign of depression. Depression is a common mental health problem but It’s important to recognise that it can become a serious condition which, if left untreated, can interfere with our work, sleep, appetite and energy levels.
How to Help Someone With Depression
Watching someone we love and care about go through depression is hard. As much as we want to help, it can be overwhelming when trying to find the best way to show support. Understanding depression and how it affects different people can help you to learn the best way to help. Sometimes all it takes is understanding and compassion. Depression is a lonely condition. Having a support network and just someone who is willing to listen can be a real island in a storm. If you have a friend or family member going through depression who needs help, read on to find out some ways you can help give comfort and support.
Learn the symptoms
Depression even in its mildest form can affect people physically as well as emotionally and mentally. There is more going on than feelings of intense sadness and melancholia. Everyone goes through depression differently but here are some of the more typical symptoms of depression. If someone exhibits 5 or more of them, they likely have developed depression and will need help.
- Very low mood with feelings of sadness and hopelessness
- Irritability and short temper
- Lost of interest in things and hobbies that they would otherwise enjoy
- Low appetite or increased appetite
- Sleeping too little or too much
- Loss of energy
- Slow thinking and body movements
- Increased anxiety and feelings of doom
- Difficulties with decision making
- Difficulties with concentration and remembering things
- Thoughts of death and suicide (ideation)
Start a conversation
Some people may not be aware that they have depression or that they can have help. Talking to them and opening up a dialogue can help them to talk about their feelings in a non-judgemental way. It’s important when talking about depression that you validate their feelings and don’t compare their situation against someone else. Show understanding and compassion. Don’t be disheartened if they don’t want to talk about their feelings initially. Just showing that you’re willing to listen and care about them will help.
Some ways to start a conversation can be things like:
- Is there anything you would like to talk about?
- I’m sorry that you’re having a hard time lately. Can I help?
- If you want to talk, I’m here for you.
Try to avoid statements or observations about their mood and condition. Judgemental remarks can impact confidence and won’t be helpful even if you feel like you’re giving advice. Avoid saying things like:
- ‘Cheer up’
- You don’t seem sad to me.
- You should exercise more to feel better.
Encourage them to seek help
Sometimes people going through depression don’t want to get help. It can be down to a number of reasons. Your encouragement can help them to feel more hopeful about feeling better. The first step towards seeking out help is always the hardest and having someone to help makes a lot of difference. It’s daunting to go about it alone. Helping them to find help, being with them when they make the bookings and taking them will only benefit their confidence.
Stay in touch
It may feel like you’re pestering them, but dropping them a message to check in will show them that you’re thinking of them. Try not to ask questions but keep things open so they aren’t pressured to reply. Just a message like ‘just checking in, here if you need me’ will make a difference.
Also try to encourage going out together and getting out of the house. Going out for a coffee or or a walk can be motivating. Make any invitations open so they don’t feel obligated to show.
Listen and be patient
Often, the best thing you can do is listen. Talking is medicine in itself and being a trusted soundboard for your friend can help them release the negative thoughts they have pent up inside. Be patient and don’t pry. If they say something that you disagree with, be empathetic and don’t criticise.
One important thing is knowing what to avoid. Listen and don’t give advice. Unless asked, it can feel like you’re trying to fix them or are judging how they are trying to manage their depression so far. Making suggestions such as offering to go for a walk gives them the option to turn it down.
Support them in their therapy
Depression comes with good days and bad days. Sometimes it seems like they’re getting better and then a bad day comes out of the blue. During these days, you can help motivate them towards sticking with their therapy. They might start to get doubts and talk about cancelling appointments. Try to help them feel positive about therapy and remind them about how previous appointments made them feel better. If you’re in the position to do so, offer to take them so they have one less stress on their mind.
Take care of yourself
Your mental health is important as well. Remember to take time out for yourself. It’s okay to look after your own wellbeing so don’t feel guilty if you need some time for yourself. If you’re caring for someone with depression and are starting to get overwhelmed with putting their needs ahead of yours, try to set some boundaries. Tell your friend when you’re available to talk so they know when to reach you. Giving them a specific time means they don’t feel like a burden and you can have some self-care time to recharge.
Know what support is available if you need help
You’re not alone. There are charities and health providers on call to give help and advice if you need it. If you’re helping someone going through depression, it’s a good idea to save some numbers on your phone if you need to reach out. If your friend or family member has a therapist, they may have an out-of-hours number or contact information for emergencies. If you’re worried that they aren’t safe by themselves and you can’t reach them, you can tell them to call Samaritans on 116 123.
Based in Brighton? If you believe you have depression or need to talk to a therapist, you can arrange for an initial consultation Email us on info@therapyclinicbrighton.com to find out the next steps or book an initial appointment online here.

Related posts
Feeling Overwhelmed by Separation? Here’s How Counselling Can Help You Heal
The Therapy Clinic are working to support people affected by Covid-19 - find out more here
Feeling Lost After a Breakup? Here’s How Separation Counselling Can Help You Find Your Way
The Therapy Clinic are working to support people affected by Covid-19 - find out more here
How Relationship Counselling Helps Address Communication Breakdowns
The Therapy Clinic are working to support people affected by Covid-19 - find out more here